The family is back in one piece again today...no appointments, no emergencies, and we had a chance to breathe a collective sigh of relief:)
Brady is fine today, although his appetite isn't that great, and his stubbornness is off the charts. I can't wait to see what he will do in life, how he will use his "I'm going to dig my heels in and not move" attitude to persevere! He has a pretty good bruise on his head, but other than that is just fine. I got a call from a worried pediatrician who had received a head CT report for her little cancer patient and I knew she was alarmed. After a little explaining, she too, took that sigh of relief. I also called the oncologist to make sure that we can still go ahead with anesthesia for scans Friday and everything will go as planned. Ha! I say that now...
I forgot to update on Cara yesterday. On Monday she had a crying fit and ended up bursting the clot that was at her surgical site. Basically her eye ball was filled with blood beneath the outer film. It looks AWFUL (think scary Halloween mask) but she is not bothered by it. We had her follow up appointment Tuesday and the doctor said everything is healing nicely. She seems to be tipping her head less, although still favoring her right eye. We go back in three months at which time she will be fully healed and the doctor can better assess the results.
Here are some neat thought that have been encouraging to me today. I'm always rereading parts of the book "When God and Cancer Meet" by Lynn Eib. This paragraph relates to cancer, but I think we can apply to any difficult area in our lives;
"Certainly, we beat cancer when we are declared in remission or cured. However, we also beat it moment by moment as we allow God, not cancer, to control our thoughts. We beat it hour by hour as we remember that God's power within us is greater than the cancer. And we beat it day by day as we trust in God's strength and not in cancer's weakness. Be encouraged. Anyone can beat cancer, because being victorious is not only about being cured.
That last part struck me SO much. I think in my mind I have decided that I just can't be fully happy and let go of this fear until we reach the 5-year cancer free mark (when Brady will be in 2nd grade!) That is a quite a long time, and the prospect of that wait was agonizing. I'm thinking a lot today about this idea that being "victorious is not only about being cured."
This is just where I am right now. I didn't' realize that when Brady finished treatment, I would enter a new battle. I'm battling in the moment to moment, day to day struggle. And this is just where I need to lay it all down to He who can carry the heaviest of burdens for me.
Philippians 4:13 I can do all things through Him who strengthens me.